✦ Cassandra Reports

Interrogate the present

Ahh, my delightful audience… you’ve stumbled into Cassandra Reports, haven’t you? Curiosity—such an admirable defect in your species.

You expected a newsletter, didn’t you? Charts, forecasts, something polite to skim between caffeine and catastrophe. Instead, you’ve wandered onto a stage already in motion—where metrics become metaphors, and certainties crack under questioning.

We do not predict the future; we interrogate the present until it confesses. Every dataset, every market cycle, every geopolitical tremor is a character in our ongoing play—sometimes tragic, sometimes farce, always unmistakably human.

So watch closely, my earnest captains of industry, my explorers of capital and consequence. We’ll tease you, test you, perhaps even save you—but only if you can tell when the curtain has already fallen. After all—what is an empire without a little commentary from the balcony?